Today was my appointment at the Ear Nose and Throat Clinic to find out why my throat/voice has been ridiculous lately. They did the scope *light* up my nose and down my throat to look at my larynx. The answer: My acid reflux (that I was diagnosed with at age 17) has gotten worse and it's been damaging the arytenoid muscles in my larynx. (Those muscles are connected to the bottom of the vocal folds...I think ha!) ANYWAY...when the acid comes up...it hits those first. SO my vocal folds are fine! (PRAISE THE LORD) I've been taking Nexium for my reflux since I was first diagnosed, but they never said anything about watching what I ate because it was low to moderate severity. Now that it is moderate severity, here is a list of things I have to avoid at all costs: - citrus foods (oranges, pineapples, lemons, limes, all juices made from them) - alcohol - tomato-based foods :*( - all carbonated beverages - all caffeine!!!!! - peppers and spicy foods - peppermint - chocolate!!! - garlic and onions - fatty foods - smoking *since that's such a huge part of my life anyway*
I'm not allowed to eat 3 hours before bed...I need to put cinder blocks under the head of my bed to elevate it...and I need to limit aspirin and ibuprofen. I need to take it easy on the singing for a bit (I'm assuming until I get this diet regimented and such) and I have to take speech therapy for a class or two to get some exercises to keep my speech up at my optimal pitch instead of way lower than I should be talking (which is where I talk all the time) SO yea! I'm glad it's over with!
The diet part is going to suck a little, but it's way better than having to deal with something like nodules or polyps on my folds! I'll take the absence of the aforementioned list over those ANY DAY!
Like when I write a blog because I'm bummed that an old friend blew me off (who turned out to have a legitimate reason anyway) haha yea like those times! What a silly girl am I! I'm not sure how the boyfwiend puts up with me! I can be a pain in the butt! :D
HOWEVER, this time I don't think I'm being over dramatic... I really think something might not be so right with my vocal folds. I get super SUPER *as in almost on the hoarse side* tired after about 20 minutes of singing...It's been like that for about a month now, but I just assumed it was because I was out of shape. Well, by this time, I should be back in shape...and it shouldn't exhaust me to talk! SO I need to make an appointment at the ENT clinic here to see about getting my throat scoped. It's pretty routine, so it's not a big deal or anything...and if it's clear, I'll know it's a tension problem and not anything that's physically wrong with my folds...so THAT'S good. It still makes me nervous a little bit.
Prayers would be much appreciated! :D
post script I miss Bryan a WHOLE lot... it makes me do this: :\ and this :*(
Any time I complain about my workload...just remind me that in my Theatre Makeup class yesterday...we watched the making of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video! (After reminding me that the Bible tells us not to complain and to be content.)
"Idol veteran voice major Samantha Bartlow was clearly one of the more comfortable on stage. Starting somberly sitting on a stool, she had total control over her voice as she sang “Hurt” by Christina Aguilera. Then, as the song climaxed, she made her way to the front of the stage, thrusting into the microphone all the emotion she had saved inside from the beginning of the song."
This weekend has been particularly interesting and eventful...in both amazing and horrible ways.
First, for Beth, I got through the first round of Mountaineer Idol! (woot woot!) It was so much fun! There were 15 of us...and 2 people sang while they were counting votes or whatever...it was REALLY LONG! The talent this year is phenomenal!!! *Of course, it was singer's choice, so everyone picked something they could WAIL on!!!* BUT It was a lot of fun! I got to sit on a stool like a big diva complete with my black pencil skirt, black shirt, red belt, red necklace, and red shoes...dark eye makeup and ruby red lipstick (Christina would be proud) haha It was a lot of fun though!! YaY! 80s week is Friday, September 21 at 8:30 in the Ballrooms
Next came my travels to Charleston... Needless to say from the title of this post...I got a speeding ticket. A one hundred and seventy five dollar speeding ticket for doing 80 in a 70. Folks...the speed limit is NOT a suggestion. 'obey the laws of your land' does not mean 'except the speed limit' ... I should have listened to my wise and loving boyfriend WAY sooner...who has been telling me since we met to stop speeding. ... I will be listening to him from this day forward. Let me tell you... it was NOT fun. I cried for 45 minutes after that...called my mom sobbing...of course she said it was ok... but here's the thing... my last post was all cocky about listening to my convictions... this one is about ignoring them...and getting a speeding ticket for it. Ever since Bryan has been telling me to stop speeding (backing it with 'obey the laws of your land') I've been convicted to stop...but I seem to always be in a hurry...so I ignore it! Well, God certainly got my attention today! (and as a funny side story...I was driving down to see my best friend Bethany in Charleston *to be there for her wedding dress search*...the only other speeding ticket I've ever had...was ALSO while driving down to see the aforementioned best friend Bethany in Charleston) I called her to tell her what happened... about 20 minutes later *of sobbing, mind you* her dad called and told me he wanted to pay for my dress!!! Of course, the ever so prideful me tried to fight him on it, but I've learned not to get into arguments about giving money with a Pentecostal Pastors...so he won.
All this to say...God is AMAZING! Not only did he teach me a HUGE lesson about listening to Him...and I got smacked in the face because I didn't listen sooner...He still provided for me financially!!!! AMAZING!! Today just taught me a lot about the character of God!
On to the dress search! I'M A MAID OF HONOR! :D So I drove down to do the dress fun... I walked in, saw her in THE DRESS and just about cried (which, I've noticed, was a pattern of the day) she tried on a few others, but none of them were as amazing as the first one! MY BEST FRIEND IS GETTING MARRIED!! It was so exciting! I can't wait for the wedding!!!!!!
...and they are honeymooning in Paris. Thou shalt not covet thy best friend's honeymoon destination...I'm sure that's in the Bible somewhere. Someone needs to be taught a lesson about that *points to self* :D
GOD IS SO GOOD!!!!!!!!
P.S. Bryan = the most amazing man I've ever met in my LIFE bar none!
So, for the 3rd year, i am a Mountaineer Idol finalist! :D I'm super excited! I always get excited about this competition because 1. If you win...you get money 2. It's a great break from the classical singing world I live in 3. I LOVE LOVE LOVE performing 4. The people are amazing to work with This year I think they said almost 70 people auditioned, and they narrowed it down to a final 15. The first round of the competition is Singer's Choice I chose to sing "Hurt" by Christina Aguileria Why? well thanks for asking! Because it's a beautiful song! It's probably not a 'crowd pleaser' and definitely not a 'show stopper' but I love it and I'm going to sing it anyway! They will eliminate 3 people tonight, and then remaining 12 will go on to compete in 80s week!
They asked for all of our song choices (in case we make it all the way through) so here's what I picked: 80s - "How will I Know" Whitney Houston Rock - "Heartbreaker" Pat Benetar Country - "Fancy" Reba McIntyre (maybe) Solid Gold Oldies - "Rescue Me" Aretha Franklin Movie Themes - the theme from "Phantom of the Opera" Finals - I'm not sure what the categories are...but if it's the same as last year...it will be something you've already performed - Phantom something new - a gospel/praise and worship song that has yet to be determined *ANY SUGGESTIONS?* something that the hosts pick out for you - *shrug*
All this information to say: I am very cautious of my song choices this year...not that I ever wasn't before, but more so now that God has been building my convictions about certain things. For example, I really like the song "Sin Wagon" by the Dixie Chicks. It's a blast to sing...my roommate was going to choreograph a line dance for the instrumental break...it's almost a guaranteed winner. However, the more and more I sang it, and really thought about the words (something I, as a singer, seldom do with popular music, sadly) I realized that I can't get up in front of hundreds of people and sing a song about a women who deliberately sins. I can't sing the line "Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition". The me in the competition last year wouldn't have thought twice about it...but each time this year I even half way considered it...the uneasiness about performing it grew and I realized that no amount of money is worth singing a song (which would essentially look like I agree with the message...and also means that I JUST realized while writing this that singing a song about a woman who's mother turned her into a prostitute so she could make money is probably not the best idea either...) with a message that goes completely AGAINST God! I'm actually really excited that I see that! YaY! It's amazing to be able to see how much I've grown within the past year. A lot of times, I can't see that...but it's really encouraging to be able to catch a slight glimpse of it today!
...I also need a new suggestion for a country song (God willing I get that far in the competition)
Does anyone remember the song from Cabaret "Money makes the world go 'round"? I hate that it's true today. I am BROKE! Today, I had the fun task of moving money from my savings (Praise GOD for that!) into my checking to pay bills... I'm managing fine. It's not a problem for me to eat pasta everyday until I can work again (NEXT Saturday) but I hate having to call the parental units and let them know that I might need a little help to get me from today to next Saturday. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think it's a pride issue to not want your parents financial help. I mean...I'm pretty much a spoiled college brat as far as comparisons go...I have a job, and I pay my own utilities and food...but that's it. No gas, no insurance, no rent...so I HATE calling them and asking for MORE money because they already do sooooooo much for me financially! :( BUT I sucked it up and left my mom a message today. She never gets mad...in fact, she's always like "you don't ever call and ask for money, sweetheart, it's OK!" It just never feels OK. BLAH!
I was talking with the loving boyfriend last night about how I can't wait to have a real job and budget money because I actually KNOW what I'll be paying for... HOWEVER, I am in NO hurry to start working a lot, and to pay for everything on my own... I just know that I live in a pseudo real world right now, with absolutely NO idea about how much things ACTUALLY cost!
In closing, I have wonderful parents, and I'm very thankful that I have the ability to call them when I'm in a financial bind (which isn't even REALLY a bind...) when I think about it...I have everything I could possibly need...and 2398472934829437 times more...and I have enough food, clothing, shelter, love in my life to survive.
...why do I even worry about it!? hmmm that's a GREAT question! anyone got an answer!? haha
Today is the first day of the semester that I actually feel like a voice/theatre student. Meaning, today is the first day that I've been as busy as past semesters. (I mean, I'm pretty busy everyday regardless, but today is the first day I actually FEEL busy...?) I can't really complain though...most of my classes are phenomenal!! For example: Theatre Makeup!!!! It's a blast! The other day...I learned how to make my nose look broken! I mean really! Who can complain about that!? And TODAY...I got to buy fake eyelashes for Thursday when we will be doing makeup of the 1970s!!
It's time to stop procrastinating and get started on some Shakespeare scansion before Bible study tonight!!!!!!!! Did I mention that I LOVE my women's Bible study!?
I promise that all of my posts won't go into the random boring details of my day...and I might actually post something thought provoking once in awhile, but today is not that day!
Welcome to the first post of my new blog! My hope is that I'll actually write in this one...only time will tell if that actually happens or not.
It's always weird to switch these things because it makes me go look at the old one...I've had a xanga for 3 years...and before that, I had a livejournal for 4 years... Not that I was faithful in my writings for either, but there is still a lot of Samantha history recorded in them. A large part of me (meaning all of me) wishes it was in a notebook or something tangible that I can hold in my hands because the thought of losing all those memories is kind of sad. Maybe I'll make it a semester long project to copy and paste everything into Word? *shrug* Any easier suggestions?
I love Jesus, I'm studying Worship and voice at Southern Seminary, I am married to the coolest guy on the planet, I wait tables to pay the bills, I love being on stage, and I wear heels whenever I can despite being taller than 75% of the population.